Bad Decisions and Sucking on the Outcome of My Actions

Last night my son and I attended the Bebe Rexah show at the Fillmore in Silver Spring MD.  This concert was just days after Bebe was pelted in the head by a phone after asking the audience to put away their phones and just enjoy the show.  She needed stitches and the fan later claimed he was tossing her the phone to get a picture.  Sounds like it was -possibly- a really bad decision with consequences that quickly went in a direction no one wanted but now everyone needed to deal with.  But that incident is not what I’m writing about here although it does involve a Bebe show, an innocent intent or 2, a cell phone, something being thrown with lots of unintended stuff happening afterward.

We arrived the the Fillmore as the opening act took the stage.  She was good but we were there to see Bebe.  A few songs into Bebe’s set I was having a hard time seeing center stage and I moved to an empty seat at our table so I could see better.  It gave me a clear shot between the people at the table in front of us.  That was until one of them woman at the table started to film the show on her Iphone Max.  I’m not sure if she was streaming the show, taking multiple videos or just one long video but it continued well into the next song.  I grabbed a napkin from our table, balled it up and tossed it down with the intent to get her intention and ask if she could unblock my view of the stage.  If my intent had any rails this is where the wheels flew off and the night took an ugly turn.  I did get her attention as intended but she was extremely angry with how I did it and boy did she let me know.  I did try and explain my issue and think I spoke calmly but it’s hard to come off as calm when communicating anything  during a concert.  She got up and told an attendant what happened; he came over and talked to me and everyone went back to their places.  A few minutes later someone from security came up to me asked what happened and he told me I needed to come downstairs.

It took me a bit to realize I was being removed from the venue for my shitty decision on how to get the woman’s attention.  In hindsight it was a dicky move and I could have done a list of different things and certainly change the outcome.  If I got up and walked down to her table she could have reacted the same; she could have realized the issue, blushed, apologized and moved her phone OR she could have cracked open my skull with a glass from the table, picked up my limp carcass and thrown me off the balcony!  We will never know.  What I do know is that sometimes what you think is a harmless action with no ill intent can still be a major issue for someone else (holding up your phone to block the view OR tossing the napkin to get someone’s attention).

Almost a full day later I’ve (over)thought through all of the “what ifs”; dealt with my embarrassment and guilt of setting off this crazy night and apologized to my son repeatedly.  Despite what the tour was called this most certainly was NOT “The best F&@king Night of My Life”.  It was a learning experience and has already impacted how I’ve chosen to start conversations today.  I cant say its changed outcomes but that’s the tricky part- you will never know.

Note: I’m being intentionally vague on the words said between me, the woman and security.  I don’t think they really matter- this is about actions and consequences around them.  The Fillmore staff did their jobs and run a great venue.